A Quarter Life Crisis

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She needs to get ready for a lot of hand shakes. As we know I don't like shaking hands for numerous reasons but that's beside the point. Could explain why I've never been asked to be the First Lady, I just don't have the chops, go figure!

I'm right in there with all the rest of the qualities. Now, there's obviously no height or race requirement. Those old mindsets rolled off with the cast to Gone With The Wind, oh I mean Dub-ya and his fair lady. And since Hillary it's also acceptable to be a working woman of the world and not just a walking humanitarian promo. That's not a slight against Nancy Reagan and her don't do drugs campaign, she's right we should all just say NO!

As I've been told the "role of First Lady" is truly charity. I mean she doesn't get paid (she hires a staff that gets paid odd I know) for playing hostess to dignitaries, attending ceremonies as arm candy to the Commander-in-Chief and beginning her own First Lady non divisive issues. One must always be a beacon of regalness without looking pretentious, because the White House isn't royalty come on this isn't Britain. She must always be a lady, Hillary didn't take this oath and even wore the pantsuits to prove it. Digressing.

If Michelle has a fan club, sign in sheet please! I mean she's the first, First Lady since Jackie Onassis Kennedy to have true fashionista qualities. It makes total sense too her husband's a freaking rock star , figuratively speaking. I know he's the big cheese but we all know he causes mass hysteria tantamount to Uncle Jesse from Full House!

Just me again, stop starring I'm allowed my teenage girl moments.

My question, what's her fight for the cause issue? Children's literacy? The only safe sex is no sex, abstinence for life? Resurrect the just say no ads? Personally I kinda dug the this is your brain on drugs commercials that played during the after school specials in place of Oprah when I was a kid.

If she asks me, doubtful I know, first she should bask in the fantabulous wonderfulness of being the First Lady, I mean the club is hella exclusive. Second she should adopt a child from some obscure nation that no one's ever heard of all Angelina Jolie-esque (cause this totally boasts your popularity with the nation hence the team Jolie-ers who could care less she bedded a married man). Third she should totally buy a Honda Prius and go Green a la Leo DiCaprio, hello ratings overdrive right here! And lastly she totally needs to be-friend Oprah. I'm not talking hi-bye friendship I'm talking kick Gail to the curb and get all up in her Oprahish-ka-bibbles. Why....because Oprah rules the world!