A Quarter Life Crisis

Rants With Atmosphere!!!

Midweek Nonsense: Am I to Believe that Thursday’s are just Batsh*t Crazy

This is the R7 - the train I actually catch to go downtown to work!


Now maybe it was the fact that I was riding the train, or maybe it’s just the fact that it’s Thursday but today was another peculiar one. Again, started with hitting the snooze, maybe I should avoid this feature going forward. Thankfully I fed the cats out of their dish instead of leaving the bag of cat food on their mat.

In any event I was running a little late, no doubt due to snoozing, and as I hustled out of the apartment I noticed I was missing my gloves. I am a creature of habit and if one thing is out of place it throws a black hole in my day. Anyway I was missing my black speckled gloves so I substituted with my purple stripe. As I made my way to the train, per habit, I reach into the front pocket of my bag to grab my ear buds. To my horriprise, I was missing the ear buds as well. Since I was running late I had no time to turn around and right the wrong. Braving the element without music is pretty devastating in my world.

Not to mention today was as cold as a witches tit-tay, I mean blustery. Large gusts of what I like to call Philarctic (combination of Philadelphia and Arctic) air molested my inner thighs with each long legged stride. Believe it or not, I don’t wear dress pants in the winter opting instead to wear skirts.

Once I was on the train and could again feel my fingers and toes I whipped out the trusty iPhone and settled in for the 20 minute ride downtown. I was seated with my back to the main cabin while facing one other passenger. I detest this view because I like to look at everyone on the train and make up stories about their lives based on their appearance. The passenger I was facing seemed normal enough, in that college professor sort of way. He was wearing a sweater with a button up shirt underneath, brown corduroy pants, loafers and an oversized black pea coat, very warm and sensible. I noted he had freckles like two of my uncles an uncommon but highly noticeable trait in black Americans.

I smiled as I sat down next to him and quickly busied myself with reading blogs. Since I didn’t have soulful sounds to soothe me on the trip downtown I could at least get a heads up on my blog reading for the day. With head tilted I could still see the College Professor out of my peripherals, not that I was watching him but hey thieves come in all shapes, sizes and colors, you can never be too careful.

After about 10 minutes or so the College Professor whips out an iPhone but it doesn’t look like he’s reading anything or answering a call, more like he’s trying to get an angle to take a picture. Initially I pay this no mind and keep reading blogs but then it kind of looks like he’s taking a picture of me. I brush this off as my mind playing tricks on me but after another minute or two it really looks like he’s trying to take picture of me so I stop reading and give him the WTF are you doing face. When he catches my glance he looks super guilty and quickly pulls his phone back and looks out the window. About two minutes later this whole cycle of events plays again, ODD!

By this time I’m heated and a little torn. Part of me wanted to grab his phone and see if he’d actually snapped a shot of me and the other part was talking me off the ledge. I don’t like when right and left brain are not on one accord. Of course I was too distracted to continue reading so I let my eyes burn a whole in his head. I stared the College Professor down for the rest of the ride. I’m sure this made him uncomfortable but I’d prefer he get a little shrinkage from fear vs growth from perverted arousal on my dime. Miraculously he was finished fiddling with this phone.

Part of me wanted to put this perv on blast, air him out for the whole train to see what a loser he is. I stopped myself from doing this because I could have been completely wrong. Maybe he was reading something and holds his phone awkwardly as if he were taking a picture, me no know!

As we arrived at Suburban Station he actually reached out his hand in an attempt to touch my shoulder. Luckily I still prescribe to the Matrix school of defense and ducked his shoulder tap Neo style. He quickly pulled his hand back as I said, “Why are you trying to touch me? If you need to get off the train, you can say excuse me and I will make room.”

He mumbled, “OK well this is my stop, I need to get off.”

Even though it was also my stop I let him exit the train completely before I picked up my purse and made my way out the door. Maybe it’s me but I think I need to stop taking the train in the morning.

Did I make more of this situation than I should have? Would you have asked him if he took a picture of you given the exchange of events? Was I wrong to pitch a bytch when he tried to touch my shoulder?



2 Pardon My French:

Ice Cold said...

Yoooo, the College Prof. story is hilarious. Actually, I think that has happened to me before. And while I felt completely violated it amazed me that people actually do this...

cardiogirl said...

Ugh, I hate people.

I would have tried to sit as far away from him as possible. Was that an option?

If not I would have ignored him and then I would have given him a dirty look when he touched my shoulder.

I'm all about the passive-aggressive lifestyle.

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