A Quarter Life Crisis

Rants With Atmosphere!!!

Weekly Rant: Obama – A Racial Opportunist Seeking Racial Authenticity?!?!?!?!?!?

What is a racial opportunist who seeks racial authenticity? Does President Obama fit the bill? Honestly I don’t know for sure because I am not 100 (this is slang it means sure, carry on) about what it really means. On a side note I do enjoy when people string together catchy phrases like these but I love it more when said person can explain it without going semi ape-shit. With that said you should check out the clip from the Today Show above it will shed some light on the post to follow.

Unfortunately the clip cuts off at the end and you don’t get to see Matt give Malkin the stank eye, which I thought was hysterical and had me laughing all the way to work…classic Lauer. I used to heart him when he had hair…I mean one morning Matt was finer than a glass of wine and the next day he was bald, WTF? Sorry I went on a small tangent.

Anywho, let me back track and say that after graduating from SJU I stopped having race conversations. It always gets out of hand and no one walks away feeling kum bah yahish instead everyone is agitated and I don’t like Agitation all that much. She’s an ugly biotch.

Here are a few reasons why I stopped knocking on Agitation’s door. One because I learned that a bigot will be a bigot until the cows come home, some people are bred badly. It takes a mighty big wind to change the direction of the storm and I don’t have wind machines at my disposal so I pick and choose my battles. And two, race much like religion and politics is divisive. Race clears a room faster than a whore can run out of Sunday school, figuratively speaking.

Amongst friends I share my little racial tidbits but even there I like to keep a tight lip because well I don’t enjoy going there anymore. I’d much rather talk about artificially inseminating rabid leopards or the joys of watching paint dry. (You get where I’m going with that I’m sure.)

But back to the matter at hand shall we. Was Barack wrong for saying he thought the Cambridge Police Dept acted stupidly, let me see…NO! Yep I said it dang it and I meant it. Let’s remove the elephant in the pinstripe suit from the room for a minute if a police officer arrests someone in his own home after he proves that he is not the burglar his neighbor thought she saw breaking into his home that smells a little stupid to me. Maybe I’m wrong.

It’s very possible I am wrong seeing I have no legal background whatsoever besides those four years of criminal justice learnings they gave me at SJU.

Alright I’m letting the pinstriped elephant back in but only briefly because he’s uncomfortable to look at. Do I understand Harvard Dude’s anger (yes I do). It gets real old real quick when you are accused of something for no other reason besides your skin color. (Trust it is not something you get used to and every time it happens it f*cks up your day) Sorry folks it just does. You know like when I went to purchase a Gucci bag from Saks (granted I was dressed very un-Saks like, what my fur coat was in the cleaners sue me!) and security was called to watch me shop. (This is ass biting I mean if I had a wedgie I now had an audience.) Maybe Harvard Dude jumped to an unreasonable conclusion….he might have been wrong…and he might have been right.

Unfortunately, we (general public) will never know because believe it or not neither one of their stories, Harvard Dude or Cambridge Cop is 100 (this is slang it means accurate, carry on). Yup I said it. (This might come as a news flash to some but people lie…I know it’s hard to believe…and here’s the topper Police lie too because guess what before they are cops they are people.) Not that I am calling either one of them liars because I believe each told his true perception of the situation. But that’s the kicker folks it’s a perception of the events not the actual events. Take for instance that the police report read that the 911 caller said two black men were possibly breaking into the home….transcript clears up this PERCEPTION as the caller never mentioned race until prompted and when she did she said she thought one of them (suspected burglars) could be Hispanic.

See that Perception is a sneaky little son of female pooch in heat!

It’s a clear case of cooler heads needed to prevail. Harvard Dude probably shouldn’t have spouted off at the mouth just because he felt some type (this is slang it means disrespected, carry on), assumed or real, and Cambridge Cop probably shouldn’t have arrested an old man who walks with a cane inside of his proven residence…it’s really that simple. The Pres probably should have kept his color commentary to a minimum and only in private said you know that was some shit, pushed it off and solved this here health care crisis. IDK those are just a few of my thoughts.

And to address the initial statement…racial opportunist seeking racial authenticity…that is just balls out dumb. If you want you can tell Michelle Malkin I said it. For one she makes the assumption that in order to belong to a race there is some sort of challenge of color. Hello I was born black no one had me fill out a questionnaire I’m sure the same rules apply for being white although I could be wrong…silly backwards broad. Second chica needs to get herself a dictionary (judging by her wardrobe she can afford it) opportunistic implies that someone derives personal benefit from a particular situation and that benefit is earned unethically…if I were to paraphrase dictionary.com and I am. Explain what type of racial benefit or any other benefit the Pres gets from making a rash statement like that….none and on top of that now he has to buy these two morons a beer and answer the ridonkulous question of whether he is racist.

Seriously Barack racist….I guess he wakes up in the morning and screams I hate you to half of his face.

Clearly I need to have some odd ball race issue happen to me and I will be one step closer to smelling Obama’s cologne. Oops did I say that out loud. Please no one secretly slip the First Lady my blog address, she might send the secret service after me.

Ok folks this was a little winded but I am now off the soapbox and Michelle Malkin, kick rocks…she’s a snippy little biotch isn’t she?

Did I mention I don’t like race talk…this is the last time…I hope!

8 Pardon My French:

ReformingGeek said...

I think your point about we don't have all the facts is very accurate.

I like your summation. Each one of them could have handled the situation differently and we all wouldn't still be talking about it and fueling the "racial profiling" fire once again.

Jenn Thorson said...

No, I don't think he's a racial opportunist. While he has spoken to his own experiences in his travels around the world, he has spoken very carefully to two sides of issues, for the most part. Such as the issues faced by both Pakistan and Israel.

I think the "stupidly" comment was off-the-cuff, yes. But frankly, I can see where the professor, having spent much of his life in a less racially-integrated existence, would be hyper-sensitive to the matter. (And professors can be serious egotists, so take anyone with narcissistic qualities and offend them and see what happens!)

Anyway, I'm sure you'll get a wide range of opinion here, but I think Obama has a lot of other things he's working on besides opportunities to insert race into it.

PS- I just want to try out your phrase "stank eye" on a couple of my friends. I think it needs to be used more. :)

dizzblnd said...

Ahhhhhhhhh politics... I have no comment. I know enough only to be dangerous. I haven't had the TV on for 2 weeks. If we were under code red right now.. I'd have no clue.

I did like the humor in this post.. you are very good at injecting it at just the right time.


Michelle Malkin is stupid... (excuse my Pre-K language here)

I don't know much about her, but judging from this clip, she was definitely raised on the wrong side of the fence...granted people are entitled to their own opinions, but wtf, in regards to the 1 female republican vote for Sotymayor & Mrs. Obama being an old crony...

The Gates thing has been a hot topic for the last few weeks, and I've read quite a few blogs & opinions on the whole matter. The only point I hope people take away from this, is that race is still a sensitive issue, and just because the Pres. is black, doesn't mean that it's "100", these things still happen in America, to Blacks, Hispanics, Arabs, & I'm sure others...these things shouldn't be swept under the rug. We need to air our dirty laundry, in hopes of getting the stench out, then maybe one day, people won't be up in arms about it...

Melinda said...

I think that Obama was right on the money when he said the police acted stupidly. Hell-O! They did! Of course, I am so wary of cops because of my own experiences with their harassment and uneven treatment (if youare a junkie prostitute, they treat you like crap, believe me). I feel it is good that people are taking a hard, good look at the racism that still exists in our country. I do believe we moving in a better direction, but we still have a long way to go, imo!


Chaotically Calm said...

@Reforming Geek, no use in fueling the fire everyone has to cool off and think before speaking...on both sides of the fence.

@Jenn, I think if we should be used to off the cuff answers from presidents after eight yrs of Dub-yah....oh be my guest, borrow the stank eye and tell me how your friends like it.

@dizzblnd, everything taste better with humor on it...oh wait that's cheese but you get what I'm saying.

@Diva, yeah we do need to get it out in the open...I think that I talked about it soooo much from HS thru College that I am just done. Not sure that we will ever be a society that doesn't see race...but at the end of the day seeing race isn't the problem really it's thinking that because of someone's race that person is less than or some way oddly different. At the end of the day we pretty much all want the same things, to have happy health friends and family...

@Melinda, I appreciate the comment sometimes it seems we take two steps forward and two steps back...

cardiogirl said...

Wow. Like dizzblnd I never watch TV and had only heard that Obama had lunch with two people and each side never apologized.


But now I know what happened because of your post. Thanks for the primer and as everyone else has noted, I love your colloquialisms.

I have always thought it was a sign of dignity and maturity to admit when you've made a mistake. It sounds like all parties involved made some mistakes and yet no one really owned it.

And whether the Prez was wrong or not is a matter of interpretation, but I would never want to be in a job that had so many people watching my every move. We all slip at some point and say things that we're thinking that may not be diplomatic.

Let's cut him some slack. Although I have to say based on O's delivery style I can totally see him saying, "The Cambridge Police Dept acted stupidly," and I'd be cool with that. No ruffled feathers.

Lastly, doesn't it seem there's more backlash on a pundit when he or she is Caucasian versus Hispanic, Asian, etc.? I don't agree with Malkin but couldn't she be Ann Coulter's twin? And don't you think there'd be more uproar about the book if Coulter were the author rather than Malkin?

Chaotically Calm said...

I agree with you, it really bothers me when people can't step back from a situation and admit he/she was wrong. Granted it takes a ginormous slice of humble pie but it shows character as a person. Given my slight touch of arrogance, at times, it is really hard to admit any wrong that I do but I recognize that living life is more about people than my pride. When I take the long dirt nap I want people to remember my character as a person and that I was all about having fun. I don't want the tombstone to read, here lays the proudest person in the world which is code for arrogant itchba (using the good ole pig latin).

To your point, Malkin is Ann Coulter's evil Asian twin. You're absolutely 100% right on the money. If Malkin were Caucasian, Al Sharpton and his crew of true racial opportunist would have gone on a hunger strike or something.

Like everything I post this is strictly my opinion, I think that people feel the sting more of racism when it comes from white folks. If another minority calls me a name (it's happened before)I can get mad but it doesn't have the same historical context. We live in a WASP (White Anglo-Saxon Protestant) society and to not be accepted by what is considered the norm can make you feel abnormal. It is totally different if someone who's also trying to assimilate finds you at fault. What does that really matter he/she is in your same bucket at the end of the day.

But who am I...just a blogger with too much time on her hands I guess.


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