A Quarter Life Crisis

Rants With Atmosphere!!!

Weekly Rant: Thoughts in Future Husband Minor….

Side note: the title sounds a lot better when you insert Future Husband’s name but you know anonymity and all.

OK this deserves a little bit of a disclaimer. Blog Friends I am doing a little switch-a-roo here. Instead of my weekly rant I am going to hit you with a bit of poetry. This is an even deeper glimpse into my inner workings so enter at your own risk. Side note I am not a poet by nature but I dabble a bit, if you don’t like it don’t worry I will return to my regularly scheduled shenanigans tomorrow with the Week in Review.

This is the poem I wrote shortly after the final break up with Future Husband. Consider this growth or I’m just lazy and can’t find something to rant about right now, whatever floats your boat.


Thoughts in Future Husband Minor©

i met him with eyes
that spoke before mouths
had a chance to catch the words
and we were introduced
with window images of our past
helping to fuse a future that could not be.
i wanted to love him
with finger tips that graze lips
before they kiss
and tug on heart strings
creating a frenzied vibration
a pit-pat staccato rhythm
and we were singing
with voices that filled silent rooms
our own hip hop beat
that carried us nightly.
i wanted to know him…
with omniscience since inception
from a dad’s seed to a mom’s womb
from a babe’s feeble wobble to a man’s stride.
and we were walking
down uncharted paths with no directions
up hills and down valleys
looking for answers to questions we didn’t know we had
about each other and ourselves
about love and about life
posed to those who walked before us
but they were broken
disenchanted nomads hoping
from place to person
from person to place
on a journey with no path.
i wanted to write him
into the chapters of my life
so my book was a fairytale instead of a nightmare
so i’d kissed frogs and found a prince with a majestic stallion….
and we were searching
and we were reaching
and we were pushing
and we were pulling
and we were sewing
but there wasn’t enough thread to build our quilt
enough fabric to drape ourselves from the outside
it crept through the creases
unraveling our newly sewn pattern
splitting the ends almost to the beginnings
so we were left, where we started…
an unfinished masterpiece that never was
i met him with eyes…eyes with him met i


5 Pardon My French:

mr. nichols said...

where's the piece?

mr. nichols said...

i am really moved by this. first, i'm really digging the title and i think the Future Husband moniker makes it even better, truthfully. there are so many gems in here and i felt like i was watching you on the ride from beginning to end. i love the section from "looking for answers to questions we didn’t know we had ... on a journey with no path."

but i think my favorite part is this:

"and we were sewing
but there wasn’t enough thread to build our quilt
enough fabric to drape ourselves from the outside
it crept through the creases
unraveling our newly sewn pattern
splitting the ends almost to the beginnings"

incredible.

Nothing Profound said...

Expresses beautifully the disillusionment and heartbreak that occur when one's dream of love unravels.

Chaotically Calm said...

@Mr. Nichols, me and Future Husband were definitely on a ride..I hit every emotion I think exists in that relationship but sadly and not so sadly it didn't work. Hopefully that was the right decision for both of us...I still have some issues from that time that make me phobic about ever going there again with anyone.

@Nothing, I'm glad I was able to convey all of that.

ReformingGeek said...

Very nice! Thanks for sharing that. It's painful but at least it's passionate.

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